Momentum Adrift

Momentum Adrift
Image provided by
blackbass @ http://www.flickr.com/photos/blackbass/

I’ve lost my enthusiasm. My inclination is to put the entire blame on the  circumstances of my life and the routine I’ve been forced into during this last month. What’s more, I think some would agree with me. My life and routine, I’m afraid, are just a part of the trouble.

It was a mere six weeks ago I felt the passion surging through me. I was getting a fair count of words down, and my intentions ran deep. I’ve been slowly accomplishing what I’ve set out to do, taking the craft of writing more seriously. But the spur for the task wanes now and I’m not sure where the bulk of the blame should lay.

Perchance the obscurity of my motivation is with the work I’m trying to accomplish with my fictional story/book. The shadows of the plot I’ve had from the beginning are still there. Little clips of what changes I foresee in my second draft are firm in my thoughts. Yet, the push to move forward is hiding somewhere within the nooks and crannies of my brain. I sit in this seat tugging and pulling, hoping to uncover the elusive veil of my inspiration.

Writing by scene has gotten me this far, eight scenes in all so far. How I’ll arrange them into chapters is something I haven’t thought too much about yet. What is disturbing me is I feel so little has been revealed within all these pages. I’m left feeling that I’m not getting anywhere.

When I allow the rational part of my noggin to come forward, I realize that with a writing project this big and still in the early stages, I shouldn’t be expecting great leaps and bounds. I tell myself, “Many writers take a few years to write a story. There is nothing saying I can’t do the same thing.” Moreover, I’m aware that with writing being one of the arts, there aren’t any right or wrong ways to go about it.

Then my natural tendencies to be a right-brained thinker pop in, shoving all common sense away and out of reach. The emotions churning inside of me emerge, playing havoc with my intentions. My mind tells me, “There are also plenty of authors who are writing stories/books within a few months. Why can’t I do the same? Where has my drive gone?” The answer is where I want to place all fault. I tell myself it’s because of my current state of affairs.

Yet, examining my circumstances with, what I hope is, an open mind, I recognize the brass tacks of my situation not being all that grave. Sure, I have my obstacles that are frustrating beyond belief at times, but I can’t fathom the idea of being the only one who has these. In addition, I’m certain other novice and seasoned writers have worse plights in their lives.

Nevertheless, part of the blame is with the calamity in my home, but more of my demise is due to lack of sureness. I keep wanting a map or instructions laid out before me, telling me where to go next and what I should be doing. With this being an impossibility to obtain, I must come up with something else that will help. It was just yesterday that I decided to give up, not forever, but long enough to get some bearings on where I am going, what I’m doing, and at what speed. Maybe just doing a survey of the writing terrain will give me confidence. During this small but important pause in my endeavor, I hope to find productive ways to display my other pieces and improve on what I’ve already done for my story.

Certainty muddled, I feel this is a plausible supplementary exertion.

 

 

Advertisements

5 Replies to “Momentum Adrift”

  1. My cousin writes. She’s in her 40’s and completed… two books, I think? She takes editing as an art. I think the editing part of it kills the motivation though.

    Like

    1. Hi Aleta

      Do you think editing kills motivation? Writing is like any other art. The artist (in this case the author) wants perfection so that’s what he works towards. Of course, because he is a artist, he’s never satisfied. Yet, he loves the process no matter how difficult it gets.

      Like

  2. You sound you are on a journey like me…I am starting my first novel and have written several scenes. I do them in Google docs and list them as glimpse #1, etc. And I keep putting off devoting my full time because of…yup, circumstances.

    Like

    1. Circumstances seems to do an ugly number on those of us who need ‘quiet time’ to complete what we want to do. Starting tomorrow and for 3 days, I’ll have some of that needed time. Am I motivated? I am, actually.

      Thank you so much for visiting and for giving me some feedback. I do appreciated it. I hope you’ll return to read future posts.

      Like

  3. You can’t compare yourself to others. Well, you can but you shouldn’t. Everyone is unique, and has different habits. Plus, adding pressure to yourself is just not worth it. There will always be someone out there who you think is better than you. There is always someone out there who is worse. Accept yourself for who you are; you will be more satisfied with yourself and your writing abilities that way.

    Like

Please comment on this post.

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s