It Was My Black Cloud – part 1

I’ve been trying to convince myself that the reason I didn’t writing anything in my blog for this last weekend is because I can’t think of anything worth writing about; and maybe what I tell you here isn’t all that interesting, but a couple of you have been waiting for me to write this. Why have I been avoiding this story? The time was devastating to me, and yet, because of all the years that have passed, I find myself incredibly bored with the telling. What happened to me changed my life so drastically within a blink of the eye.

During the last half of my senior year of high school I dated several guys. Although I enjoyed their company, my thoughts were centered on how I was going to make music a feasible major in college. Let’s face it — having a successful career in music must be one of the hardest things to do, if not the very hardest. I was already sure that I was not going to be a flutist that become a celebrity. I’d be lucky to get one of the first chairs in a city orchestra.

One guy I dated several times during that last semester was Robin. I told my mom that he was nineteen, when in reality, he was twenty-two. I’m not sure why I decided to date him. It wasn’t to rebel against my parents. And it wasn’t because he took me anywhere that guys young than he had taken me. And it certainly wasn’t because I loved him because I knew that I didn’t. He didn’t take me out often, maybe about every six weeks or so. Although he never said, I was quite sure that he had other girlfriends.

After graduation, my plans were to spend that summer at Eisenhower Park on most days and not to have a part-time job for once. I had a strong feeling that summer would never be the same again once I was in college so I wanted to make the most out of this one.

The first day enjoying the pool at the park, I got together with all the friends I had in previous years. There was also a boy I had met five years before, but he hadn’t been around enough to really click with our brood. I was told that one of the guys in our group had a falling out with this other guy. Obviously, whatever was between them had changed for the better. His name was Tim.

Tim and I were the same age, just went to different schools. He was tall and burly, and also sweet and fun to be around. We hit it off right away. On most days, we were spending six to twelve hours with each other. Yes, I was falling in love for the first time.

I knew that Robin would call at some point that summer. Because of the way I felt about Tim, I knew I had to break it off completely with him. The point of that call came on Independence Day (July 4 for those of you outside of the US).

I thought about going on with this story until the end, but I find myself having trouble wording what I was to tell you. I guess I could just tell it like it is but that might be an entire book. I need to condense it. If I don’t do it right, there are going to be misconceptions, which is something I can’t allow for this story. Be assured that I will be back with the rest of this.

Read part 2 here. | Read part 3 here.