can't we all get along?

The title of this post is a writing prompt I found at Writing.Com. I was going to write a memoir scene but to tell you the truth, I’m a little burnt out on that line of topics right now.

I won’t be using the real names or their associations with me in this post. I do this to protect the innocent and myself. Anyway, there are people I feel I must get along with in my life and giving out the true names would destroy everything.

can't we all get along?
Image provided by
Kristin Kokkersvold @

Have you even known someone who is set on making your life miserable? She or he will try to pick fights with you in order to feel superior and somehow prove to someone else that you are wrong in some way. Most of my life I’ve been blessed with not knowing someone who does this. However, I know someone like that now.

When I first met Zelda, she was a nice person. She was a little bit of a ‘know-it-all’ about a few aspects of life but it didn’t bother me. She had some good information to share so I let her attitude be what it was. I only had a few weeks to get to know her before I had to leave so go overseas. I tried to make good use of this time in hopes of having her as a closer friend when I returned.

Two years later, I returned but ended up living in the next town west of her and her family. Hubby and I were in her town occasionally and we’d stop by her house to see if she was home. Zelda seemed to have changed a bit since those first weeks I began to know her. She had gotten cynical about some people and it looked like she had gotten into the habit of talking about them and usually in a derogatory way. Because I didn’t know much about the town, the area, or even the state I was living in, I listened but with reservations.

Four years later, Hubby and I moved again and were several states away from Zelda and her family. We didn’t have any direct contact with her until six years later when we visited for a wedding celebration. Her scorn had become worse. In addition, her protectiveness towards her family seemed rather dysfunctional to me. I was able to keep my opinion to myself, which I, now, question as being the right thing to do. I knew that she wouldn’t listen to me but maybe someone in her family would have.

It’s now been six years since we’ve moved back to this state where Zelda lives. In fact, we moved into the very town where she and her family reside. Hubby and I see her on occasion because Hubby and her husband go fishing together and have developed a good rapport with each other.

The woman has gotten worse, I’m afraid. There doesn’t seem to be anyone she trusts outside of her family. She has become mean and nasty to anyone who doesn’t agree with her on any given subject — that is except for the members of her family.

She has insulted me more than once without any prompting from me. In fact, in all cases, it’s been when I’ve tried to be helpful. When she could have said something like, “Thanks but I think I like my way better,” or even said, “No, that won’t work,” she, instead has said, “That’s a stupid idea,” or “You can’t help. You can’t help anyone.” Yes, she can be quite vile.

Why is it that we can’t get along? I’d rather not have to deal with her at all but because of associations with some other people, I’m pushed into a corner with no way out. I am not looking for a solution anymore. I’m sure one of you will say that I shouldn’t have to deal with her. Real life isn’t like that. Sometimes you have to suck it up and just muddle through.

I have concluded that Zelda has some serious issues with trust, control, and delusions. And, unfortunately, she has passed these problems on to the other members of her family. I have learned to avoid her when I can. When that isn’t possible, I try my best to ignore her seeing that I will not tolerate being alone with her anymore.

I keep on remind myself that this is just part of the roller-coaster ride of life.

11 thoughts on “can't we all get along?

  1. Elizabeth Potter, c.p.c.

    I’ve known folks like that, heck I spent most of my life like that, until I figured out life is to be enjoyed not trudged through. Simply know that her insults have nothing to do with you and everything to do with her as she is not happy on any level and she probably has no idea that she is angry as it seems ( from your post) that no one has called her out on her behavior. Even though your not looking for a solution, may I suggest the book Verbal Judo to help deal with your encounters.



    1. Glynis Jolly

      I’ve heard of this book. At this time, the money to buy it isn’t available even at the Kindle price under $5. This post was more of an exercise to see if I could get my feelings out in a rational way. Seeing that I haven’t done this in quite a while, I think I did okay.


      1. Elizabeth Potter, c.p.c.

        I think you did just great! I have the same issue, I tend to blurt things out – truly blunt in my verbal expressions. I have learned to hold back a bit and rethink my delivery on what’s on my mind. 🙂
        They have videos on youtube,about verbal judo, which of course are free.

        Liked by 1 person

  2. She sounds depressed to me. I had a friend (thankfully, we moved many states away) who would find something embarrassing to tell others to make me look bad or stupid. She was the one with the problem, not me. If I had a chance to speak when we had conversations, because she did all the talking, she simply ignored what I said. Life was all about her. If I had to put of with her on occasion, I would probably make up a story in my head in order to ignore her while she was speaking.


    1. Glynis Jolly

      I’m sure she is depressed, April, most narcissists are. They can’t get enough attention, which is perpetuating the problem. What I find sad is her daughter is following in her footsteps.


    1. Glynis Jolly

      Tess, your thought was my first thought when Zelda and I started having problems getting along. However, I took a step back that time because I thought there was a possibility that I might be the one who was envious. Time finally showed me that I wasn’t envious at all and, by that time, Zelda was on the edge. Living in a small town has its perks but this isn’t one of them. :O


        1. Glynis Jolly

          True, she was, but that first conversation that started it all was about our kids. Like all good moms do, we both stood up for our own kids. However, somehow this one conversation started her going on everything else. How was I suppose to know that she’d go ballistic on me?


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