Reciprocating Follows

Reciprocating Follows
Image provided by Katherine Anderson

I started blogging in 2004 — or was it 2005 — or was it 2003. Anyway, I’m not a newbie by any means. As a personal blogger, one of my major activities should and is traveling through the blogosphere visiting other blogs and writing comments about what I’ve read. It’s known as common courtesy. They visit my blog. I go visit theirs.

During the past few years, I’ve tried to tighten my blog travels to the blogs where my comment just isn’t “Nice post”, “Another good one”, Enjoyed the read”, etc. Much more often than not, these bloggers aren’t visiting my blog for anything interesting either. They do it so their count of ‘followers’ stays up. Some don’t even reciprocate the visit even though they’re ‘following’ me. I’ve been guilty of the same thing in the past. The appearances have ended up feeling more like a competition, which in my estimation isn’t what the activity should be about.

I don’t know how it is at other blog hosting sites, but at WordPress.Com, this type of activity is going on constantly. I’ve been with WP for over four years. I can tell you honestly that this behavior wasn’t half this bad when I first joined the site.

My opinion: This practice is bogus,  phony, cheesy. I know. It sounds harsh and cruel. Nonetheless, is this manner of conduct something I want to be known for, to be a part of? No. I want to be know as a person who is sincere, caring about the people I know, authentic, and truthful. It should be this way in cyberspace as well as in the off-line world.

How do I go about creating and keeping a conscientious and decent presence? Of course, a lot has to go into this, but for this post, I’ll address my mannerisms within the realm of the blogosphere.

I do not follow other bloggers anymore just because they’re following me. If the person’s blog has posts I find interesting — sure, I’ll follow that blog even if that person decides he or she doesn’t want to follow me anymore. Approximately every two to three months I’ll go peek at blogs on that recommended list at WP just to see what else is out there. If I find one interesting, I click on ‘Follow’. I do not expect a ‘follow’ back. Occasionally, I come across a blog, because I received the notice of him or her following me or I just happened to come across it, where I find some interesting posts but not many. No, I will not click that button. However, if the person has a Twitter account, I’ll follow him or her there. We have common interests but our life paths are completely different. Still, running into each other and reading each other’s post then would be enjoyable.

Do I sound like an egotistic ass? That isn’t my intention but if that’s what you think, I can’t do anything about it. It’s your opinion and you’re entitled to it.

In addition to being unfeigned — true, I only have so many hours in a day. How many blog posts can I read and still have time to write and do the daily chores of a housewife? Maybe — just maybe I could get a few more in if I didn’t have a physical disability that hinders my maneuverability. Most housework takes me half again as long as it would if I was ‘able-bodied’. The same goes for pounding on the keyboard during my writing sessions. (Sorry about bring up the disability so often, but it’s necessary to explain some of what each day is for me. I hope you don’t interpret it as a social crutch.)

Right now, I’m subscribed to 37 blogs. I know that this is a meager number to most bloggers at WP. Be that as it may, I hit each of those blogs every time there’s a new post — or at least I read one of the person’s posts once each week. My comments are not as I mentioned above. I put some thought into my replies to the posts. After all, these people put some thought into writing the entries.

I want people to see me as and think of me as being  ingenuous and real.

Reciprocating follows may  incite an atmosphere of good will and maybe even spark some friendships, but if exploited will waste time and give false impressions.


What are your thought on this?


“Unless your heart, your soul, and your whole being are behind every decision you make, the words from your mouth will be empty, and each action will be meaningless. Truth and confidence are the roots of happiness.” ~ author unknown


29 thoughts on “Reciprocating Follows

  1. I think bottom line YOU can only blog the way you feel is the right way. Other people will in turn do things they feel is “their right way.” I like what you said though about really visiting someone and not just leaving a blanket comment. I’ve never done that and I also get annoyed by those when it is obviously what it is. 😉

    Liked by 2 people

    1. I’m sure with all the subscribers you have, there isn’t any way you can visit all of them. I could probably bet money that you don’t follow all that follow you either. This popularity and completion gig has to stop somewhere, right?


  2. I understand your point of view, and agree that following a blog just for the sake of racking up numbers is pointless.
    If a blog is interesting to me I will follow it. Sometimes during WordPress classes, such as Blogging101, etc., I will contribute by visiting new blogs, and I make it a point to leave detailed comments…unless there is nothing for me in a given blog, then usually I will leave quietly. If it is a new blogger and it is obvious that I have little or no interest in their site, sometimes I will visit and leave some sort of comment, even if it is a mention of the theme used or the lay-out. If I find the content offensive for some reason I just don’t follow it in the first place, or leave it with no fan-fare.

    Liked by 3 people

        1. Yes, poor OM was flooded royally with spam a while back. He even disappeared for a while. Still, when he returned, so do the spam. At least this way he has a little control over it.


    1. It’s nice to know that I’m not the only one who feels this way. Yes, I’ve visited blogs while taking one of the WP courses (that’s how I found you 😛 ). Also like you, I’ll comment at those blogs if I have something worth seeing. If not, I leave.


      1. It’s like meeting people face to face in a way, if it doesn’t seem promising there is no obligation to continue to follow. I find something positive in almost every blog I see, and if there’s too much I don’t like I stop following…its as simple as that. 🙂

        Liked by 1 person

  3. I too only follow sites I’m interested in. I do visit anyone who visits me. And, I take the time to comment if they’ve commented on mine. Rarely do I find a blog I have zero interest in. People are much too fascinating and diverse for that!

    Liked by 2 people

    1. I probably need to open up a little with what blogs I visit to reciprocate theirs. I just can’t find the time. Sure, there are times when I sit here wondering what I should do next, but it’s usually because I’m stalling. :/


  4. In the beginning, I thought I had to reciprocate, but don’t anymore.I read and follow the ones of interest to me now. Blogging is supposed to be enjoyable. I had been to the point of point in a 12-hour day reading and commenting and I burned out.
    Fascinating subject, Glynis. Good to hear others’ opinions. 🙂

    Liked by 2 people

    1. You hit on one of the major reasons I wrote this post, Tess. When I was blogging in hopes of making money, I was all over the blogosphere trying to think of something interesting to reply with. Yes, then came the burn out.

      You’re absolutely right about what blogging should be — enjoyable. I’ll add intriguing and provocative. 😉

      Liked by 1 person

  5. I started blogging in…2003, 2004? A long time ago, it seems. I feel like there was more of a community spirit then, and less so now. I suppose blogs have fallen out of fashion, but as your above commenter mentioned, people are far too fascinating for me to let go just yet.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Jay, I think blogging is still ‘in fashion’ but the reason for the fascination has gotten somewhat grim. Learning and actual communication have been pushed to the back and competiveness and popularity are in lead. There’s still those of us who thrive on wisdom and camaraderie with others. We’ll just carry on in our own direction of this ‘fad’. 😉

      BTW, as a person with disability myself, if I’m not having one of my “bad foot” days, you are welcomed to my handicap place in the parking lot. It irks me that there are people who don’t realize how many hidden disabilities there are. 😦


  6. I also feel this thing of visiting someone else’s blog so they visit yours is not the best way to gain followers, or honest. I follow the blogs of people who interest in some manner (for example, you showed me a kindness, and I also find your articles/posts an interesting read).

    I think the key really is to just engage with those you want to do so with, and expect nothing in return. I find very few follow me that I regularily read and sometimes comment on. That’s not a bad thing when you’re reading their articles/posts for your own enjoyment and/or curiosity.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Drae, like you, many of the blogs I follow are owned by people whose interests don’t take them to my blog. I’m not offended at all about this. I feel that the blogosphere is a place to learn, grow, and communicate in whatever direction is chosen.

      Thanks for visiting, Drae. I’ll see you at the Coffeehouse. 🙂

      Liked by 1 person

  7. Glynis, I’ve read your comments on other blogs enough to know I wanted to take a peek at yours. This post covers a lot of blogging ground. The number of blogs out there, wherever out there is, is huge. We have to pick and choose and still have a life, both a writer’s life and a real world life beyond blogging. No one need make excuses about how their choices are made. I agree that clicking the follow button and doing nothing else is insincere, but that isn’t an attribute I have to accept for myself. Seems that you don’t either.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. First, thank you for visiting. I love it when someone comes for the first time and has plenty to say.

      Sharon, I used to click on that button just because the blogger had clicked on mine. Then when I’d pass the blog by on my daily sprint through emails, I’d feel guilty. Yet, I just couldn’t bring myself to read something I had no interest in, so I kept following this pattern. It finally dawned on me that there aren’t any rules to who you follow and even how you follow. Ah, the serenity of the enlightenment. 😛


    1. I’ve found good friends too through reciprocating follows. And, as you point out, my interests are in line with theirs. But some follow me for reasons I can’t fathom. I’m glad to have them, of course, but our interests are so different. I can’t see the point in following their blogs.

      BTW, obviously we’re of like minds. We decided to follow each other. 😀

      Liked by 1 person

  8. Pingback: Reluctance to Grasp | A Scripted Maze

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